A wise man once said, “Show me a leader, and I will show you one who serves.”
Today, I put to you that, “show me a leader and I will show you one who is emotionally intelligent.”
Now, what is emotional intelligence?
No, it is not one who is manipulative and plays mind games. Nor is it one who is cunning, the world’s definition of being “smart”.
Neither is it one who preys on others emotions, an emotional predator nor a narcissist.
An emotionally intelligent person is one who is able to perceive, control and evaluate emotions, as well as understand, interpret and respond to the emotions of others.
A leader who is emotionally intelligent shows great capability in demonstrating the following:
- Self Awareness:
Self Awareness is the art of understanding one’s emotions and the corresponding impact on one’s performance.
“You know what you are feeling and why—and how it helps or hurts what you are trying to do. You sense how others see you and your self-image reflects that larger reality. You have an accurate sense of your strengths and limitations, which gives you a realistic self-confidence. It also gives you clarity on your values and sense of purpose, so you can be more decisive when you set a course of action.
Leaders who are self-aware can recognize when their emotions have a negative impact on their work, or on the people around them. They are then better equipped to address it in an effective way, such as through creating opportunities for feedback, experimenting with different ways to motivate their team, or being more open to creative solutions. “– Daniel Goleman.
- Self Management:
One of the fruit of the Spirit is Self Management a.k.a self-control.
Without it, a man’s life would be led by his impulses, as erratic as they could be. And would be dictated by his feelings – as wide-ranging as they can be. With self Management, one is able to control impulsive feelings and behaviours, follow through on commitments and adapt to changing circumstances.
- Social Awareness:
The ability to accurately pick up on the emotions of other people and understand what is really going on with them; the ability to truly empathize with others, the patience to understand what they say, and sense what they feel is indispensable as a person, talk more, a leader.
Social Awareness is the ability to look outward to learn about and appreciate others.
- Relationship Management:
Here, a leader uses the awareness of one’s emotions and those of others to manage interactions successfully. It is the ability to inspire others, manage conflicts and foster teamwork amongst diverse people, thereby steering them towards the set vision or target.
It is no wonder that a person’s emotional intelligence is of greater value than IQ in determining one’s overall success in life.
And while some people are born with a bit more emotional intelligence than others, the good news is that Emotional Intelligence can be learned by all.